Favorite Buffy Quotes

As part of my celebration of Buffy the Vampire Slayer‘s twentieth anniversary, I thought I’d post a few of my favorite quotes. This isn’t all of them, by any means, but it’s a decent sample. I still reference some of these quotes today (though not necessarily in their original form).

“It’s the end of the world. Everyone dies. It’s rather important, really.”
(Doomed)

“Oh great. It’s the winged monkeys.”
(The Pack)

“Does anybody else feel like we’ve been Keyser Soze‘d?”
(The Puppet Show)

“Don’t you have an elsewhere to be?”
(Welcome to the Hellmouth)

“You were destined to die. It was written.”
“What can I say? I flunked the written.”
(Prophecy Girl)

“Now, there’s something you don’t see everyday.”
“I’m gonna be in therapy till I’m thirty.”
(The Dark Age)

“Did we win?”
“Well, we averted the Apocalypse. I give us points for that.”
(The Harvest)

“Once again I’m banished to the demon section of the card catalog.”
(The Puppet Show)

“God, what is your childhood trauma?!”
(Welcome to the Hellmouth)

“Pathetic much?”
(Some Assembly Required)

“Less than two minutes. Dumb guy. Little bomb. How hard can it be?”
(The Zeppo)

“Oh please! Look at his jacket. He’s got the sleeves rolled up, and the shirt! Deal with that outfit for a moment.”
“It’s dated?”
“It’s carbon dated. Trust me, only someone living underground for 10 years would think that was still the look.”
(Welcome to the Hellmouth)

“Okay, first of all, what’s with the outfit? Live in the now, okay? You look like DeBarge!”
(Welcome to the Hellmouth)

“Something’s coming, something, something…something is, is going to happen here. Soon!”
“Gee, can you vague that up for me?”
(Welcome to the Hellmouth)

“You’re like a textbook with arms. I know this.”
(Welcome to the Hellmouth)

“Okay, this is where I have a problem. See, because we’re talking about vampires. We’re having a talk with vampires in it.”
(The Harvest)

“This is just too much. I mean, yesterday my life’s like, ‘uh-oh, pop quiz.’ Today it’s ‘Rain of Toads.‘”
(The Harvest)

“I can’t believe you of all people are gonna Scully me.”
(The Pack)

“It’s bad?”
“It’s devastating. He’s turned into a 16 year old boy! Of course you’ll have to kill him.”
(The Pack)

“What, they were all out of boils and blinding torment?”   (Angel)

“Whoa, stop this crazy whirlygig of fun. I’m dizzy.”  (Angel)

“Cavalry’s here. Cavalry’s a frightened guy with a rock, but it’s here.”
(Becoming, Part 2)

“OK. I’ve pretty much missed out on some stuff, didn’t I? Because this is all making a kind of sense that’s… not.”
(Becoming, Part 2)

“I wonder where I’ve seen this before. Where else? The place where I spend most of my waking hours memorizing stuff off the sides of mausoleums. Big freaky cereal boxes of death.”
(Doomed)

“It’s the end of the world.”
“Again?!”
(Doomed)

“I think it’s very clear what’s happening here.”
“Fill me in then, ’cause I’ve read the book, seen the movie and I’m still fuzzy about what’s going on.”
(I Only Have Eyes For You)

“Because you are the Chosen One.”
“Just this once I’d like to be the Overlooked One.”
(Inca Mummy Girl)

“You have responsibilities that other girls do not.”
“Oh! I know this one. Slaying entails certain sacrifices, blah, blah, bliddy-blah. I’m so stuffy. Give me a scone.”
(Inca Mummy Girl)

“Oh yeah, fun was had. Also frolic, merriment and near-death hijinks.”
(Listening to Fear)

“All right, I’ll just jump in my time machine, go back to the twelfth century and ask the vampires to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days while you take in dinner and a show.”
(Never Kill a Boy on a First Date)

“Once again I teeter at the precipice of the generation gap.”
(Out of Mind, Out of Sight)

“And they say romance is dead. Or maybe they just wish it.”
(Pangs)

“Great plan. That’s right up there with ‘duck and cover.'”
(Primeval)

“I don’t like you. At the end of the day I pretty much think you’re a vampire.”
(Prophecy Girl)

“I may be dead, but I’m still pretty. Which is more than I can say for you.”
(Prophecy Girl)

“What do we do now?”
“I vote panic.”
(Prophecy Girl)

“It’s not a date, it’s a caffeinated beverage. Okay, sure, it’s hot and bitter like a relationship that way, but…”
(Reptile Boy)

“This shouldn’t take long. I’m probably the only girl in school who has the Coroner’s Office bookmarked as a favorite place.”
(Some Assembly Required)

“Not every dream you have comes true. I mean, what else did you dream last night? Can you remember?”
“I dreamt that Giles and I opened an office supply warehouse in Vegas.”
“You see my point.”
(Surprise)

“Punishing yourself like this is pointless.”
“It’s entirely pointy. I was a moron.”
(When She Was Bad)

“First vampires, now witches… no wonder you can still afford a house in Sunnydale.”
(Witch)

“We’re right behind you. Only, further back.”
(Witch)

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